If I Could Hate You

I wish I could hurt you
or hate you or fuck you
but I can do nothing
except but to love you.
I wish I could tell you
could see you, could say
what I have been thinking
since that dreaded day.
I wish i could hit you
or curse you or fight you
but all that I want
is to just do right by you.
I wish I could hold you
mine again for one day
and play make believe
make believe you would stay.
But all of my wishes
fall silent in vain
for lover you shall never
be mine again.